Blood boiling mad

Nothing raises by blood pressure more than the peck, peck, peck of the woodpeckers that insist on searching for their next meal in my siding when Sam and Julia are trying to take a nap. Other moms know how precious nap time is for accomplishing chores, making phone calls, and that all important bowl of ice cream in front of the tv (or the computer). Having to go outside and throw sticks and rocks at the birds I'm sure has the neighbors thinking I'm insane. These are not my proudest moment - a messy haired, pajama clad woman yelling like a trucker and throwing sticks like a maniac is probably the reason they haven't ever stopped by to introduce themselves. I had just come downstairs after getting Julia up for the morning when I heard hammering. All the kids were accounted for - Brianna in the booster chair (not banging her feet), Sam playing with his trains (not bashing them together), Julia in my arms, and the dog, clearly upset by the banging, but not adding too it. Who was in my attic banging with a hammer? It wasn't the normal woodpecker sound that I'm all too familiar with. That is more like a person knocking on the door (or more precisely, knocking on the kid's bedroom doors). This was hammering. I stepped on the deck to investigate and saw this:

I didn't think. I picked up a rock from my arsenal I keep handy by the front door for just such an occasion and started hurling the rock two stories up to get this pileated woodpecker to LEAVE MY FREAKING HOUSE ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So far I've only had to scare it off one more time - right after I put Julia down for her nap and Sam was sitting on the potty. I grabbed the camera and managed to get a picture of it. I don't think Brian would believe me otherwise. Thankfully Sam was still sitting on the toilet when I returned and not doing any number of things that a three year could come up with to do, unsupervised in the bathroom.